Why is it as women we tend to tear one another down when we should be lifting each other up?
You are beautiful. For a million reasons. Maybe you have a smile that lights up a room. Maybe you have great hair, a great figure, cute ears or a button nose. Why can't it be those things that we focus on in each other and ourselves instead of the 'flaws'?
So here is my suggestion--- as you walk past someone--- be it a friend, a coworker, an acquaintance or even a foe, and you notice something about them that you like... say something. I did it just this morning without thinking about it. I mentioned to my coworker that she looks really cute today and he face lit up. She has been walking around the office with her head held high and maybe doing a bit of a sashay. Atta girl! Rock what you got!
The important part is that you mean it. Faking it just won't do. People see through that. But when you do notice, make a point to lift her up. Breaking each other down isn't working. For any of us. Be a positive force and in turn you get to feel good about making someone else feel good. It's a win/win!
To say something so simple, to make such a tiny gesture and make someone's day? THAT is power.
Be powerful. Make someone's day. Do. It. Now.
Wednesday, November 25, 2015
Monday, November 16, 2015
Back on Track to Forgiveness
I recently had a conversation with a friend about how far 'off track' she felt her life was. I found myself telling her it isn't about how far off track you feel you are or how many times you go off the rails, but whether you get yourself back ON track.
And that's what I am doing with my weight loss journey. It hasn't been easy. It hasn't even been a consistent effort. But I am still working on getting back on track- and truly, that is what counts.
I still need to learn to not beat myself up for slipping and gaining some of the weight back. I need to learn how to forgive myself. I am pretty good at forgiving others for their shortcomings and failures, but I hold myself to a higher standard. Sometimes, that's a great thing because I strive to be an overachiever. Sometimes, the drive to be the best leaves me feeling let down when I don't feel that I have achieved the goals I set for myself.
I have begun to forgive myself in the last few weeks. And what do you know? The weight is starting to come off. Who'd have thunk??
I think holding myself accountable is critical, but not stressing about my mistakes has given me the freedom to be me and listen to my body and not what the media would have me believe is the best thing for me.
So if I can pass on one message it would be to learn to forgive. Yourself in particular. You are not perfect and that's ok. You're perfectly you and more than what you weigh, or where you work, or how much savings you have, or how many friends you have--- are you happy on your path? If you are- then it is the right one for you. Now own it and forgive yourself if you get a little off track. It happens to the best of us- to the best of you.
And that's what I am doing with my weight loss journey. It hasn't been easy. It hasn't even been a consistent effort. But I am still working on getting back on track- and truly, that is what counts.
I still need to learn to not beat myself up for slipping and gaining some of the weight back. I need to learn how to forgive myself. I am pretty good at forgiving others for their shortcomings and failures, but I hold myself to a higher standard. Sometimes, that's a great thing because I strive to be an overachiever. Sometimes, the drive to be the best leaves me feeling let down when I don't feel that I have achieved the goals I set for myself.
I have begun to forgive myself in the last few weeks. And what do you know? The weight is starting to come off. Who'd have thunk??
I think holding myself accountable is critical, but not stressing about my mistakes has given me the freedom to be me and listen to my body and not what the media would have me believe is the best thing for me.
So if I can pass on one message it would be to learn to forgive. Yourself in particular. You are not perfect and that's ok. You're perfectly you and more than what you weigh, or where you work, or how much savings you have, or how many friends you have--- are you happy on your path? If you are- then it is the right one for you. Now own it and forgive yourself if you get a little off track. It happens to the best of us- to the best of you.
Friday, August 28, 2015
Dangerous Curves Ahead!
I never thought I would be one to rock the skinny pants (not skin-tight skinny, mind you). Yet I find that when I wear my slim pants and a cute top and some wedges, I walk a little taller and maybe add a touch of sashay!
Crazy, right? I strut my face off and feel good about my curves. I haven't really lost any major lbs. lately, but I have been adding quite a bit of ab work to my routine and I am finding that even if my tummy isn't flat--- but it isn't getting in the way of my daily tasks, I am starting to feel good in my skin. I haven't cracked the secret as to how to feel that way all the time- when I do, I promise to share!
But in the meantime, I am going to stick to the plan. Just do better every day. And so far, it is helping! It may not be whittling my waistline or toning my thighs at a breakneck speed, but it is reshaping my brain and I think that is the biggest barrier we all face in this world of stick figure models. I will never be skinny and I don't really want to be. I want to be healthy. And hot. I'd love to be hot!
Truthfully, it isn't every day I feel this way, but when I do, I have made a conscious decision to revel in it. Sock it all in! I am not going to love myself and my shape every day. I know this. But on the days that I do- LOOK OUT! Oh yeah, that's me pretending walking up my driveway is the equivalent to walking a catwalk. What of it??
Crazy, right? I strut my face off and feel good about my curves. I haven't really lost any major lbs. lately, but I have been adding quite a bit of ab work to my routine and I am finding that even if my tummy isn't flat--- but it isn't getting in the way of my daily tasks, I am starting to feel good in my skin. I haven't cracked the secret as to how to feel that way all the time- when I do, I promise to share!
But in the meantime, I am going to stick to the plan. Just do better every day. And so far, it is helping! It may not be whittling my waistline or toning my thighs at a breakneck speed, but it is reshaping my brain and I think that is the biggest barrier we all face in this world of stick figure models. I will never be skinny and I don't really want to be. I want to be healthy. And hot. I'd love to be hot!
Truthfully, it isn't every day I feel this way, but when I do, I have made a conscious decision to revel in it. Sock it all in! I am not going to love myself and my shape every day. I know this. But on the days that I do- LOOK OUT! Oh yeah, that's me pretending walking up my driveway is the equivalent to walking a catwalk. What of it??
Tuesday, August 18, 2015
I am MORE than My Weight
That's right, you heard me critics! I am more than my weight. I know what you see on the outside is a thick, curvy woman, but try to remember that I am also a coworker, a friend, a wife and a good person.
Try to remember that when you stop me in the ladies' room to ask me if I am pregnant that all I want to do is hide and cry because, no, I most definitely am not pregnant but now my belly is all I can think about.
Try to remember that when you call me fat that I have other things going on in my life and sometimes those things get in the way of my weight loss journey.
Try to remember that I work hard all day and dedicate myself to being my best, not just to being skinny.
Try to remember that bullying is even more ridiculous coming from what is supposed to be a grown adult.
Try to remember that just because you are thinner than I am, it does NOT make you better than me.
Try to remember that lifting people up is more rewarding than beating them down.
Try to remember that I am first and foremost a real, live human being with real, live feelings.
I will try to remember that if you need to insult me to make yourself feel better, you and your silly opinion is not worth worrying about and that I am indeed MORE than my weight.
Try to remember that when you stop me in the ladies' room to ask me if I am pregnant that all I want to do is hide and cry because, no, I most definitely am not pregnant but now my belly is all I can think about.
Try to remember that when you call me fat that I have other things going on in my life and sometimes those things get in the way of my weight loss journey.
Try to remember that I work hard all day and dedicate myself to being my best, not just to being skinny.
Try to remember that bullying is even more ridiculous coming from what is supposed to be a grown adult.
Try to remember that just because you are thinner than I am, it does NOT make you better than me.
Try to remember that lifting people up is more rewarding than beating them down.
Try to remember that I am first and foremost a real, live human being with real, live feelings.
I will try to remember that if you need to insult me to make yourself feel better, you and your silly opinion is not worth worrying about and that I am indeed MORE than my weight.
Thursday, August 6, 2015
Weak Ankles
I know that walking is not necessarily the most vigorous work out, but it's one I can do on my breaks at work- one I can do with friends- one I can do with my weak ankles.
For those of you who don't know, I managed to roll both of my ankles (at the same time) early this spring while headed out to work. It wasn't icy. It wasn't all that cold. I wasn't wearing towering heels or in a terrible hurry. I simply stepped off of my back porch and my left ankle gave out. When I tried to catch myself with my right ankle, I rolled that one too. I found myself laying flat on my back in a puddle of my spilled coffee staring up at the sky thinking "Who in the world am I going to get to come scrape me off of my patio?"
It couldn't be the hubs, as he hadn't gotten home from work until after 3:30am and he was upstairs completely konked out... A neighbor? Nah, I don't really want them to see me like this: ripped knee in my brand new pants, drenched in coffee, and whimpering like a 6 week old puppy. So I tried to stand... NOT my smartest decision of the day and let's be honest- it wasn't even 7 a.m. and I wasn't off to a great start.
I proceeded to crawl up the two steps and into my kitchen where as I tried to tenderly peel my boots off while my dogs assisted in the cleaning off of the coffee now dripping down my face. Again, not my proudest moment. It took me several minutes to roll myself onto my feet but then I did manage to hobble my way into my laundry room and change into a different outfit, slip on some flats and make my way to work, mewling all the way. By mid-afternoon, both of my ankles were so swollen, my boss sent me home. Oh yeah, they were that bad.
I have spent the last few months babying my ankles and still trying to find a way to exercise. NOT an easy task when most of the activities I was involved in, Focus T25, Zumba, volleyball all involve jumping and having good balance. No dice. So now I walk. I try to walk every single day and my FitBit helps to keep me accountable. Walking may not make you sweat buckets, but it is purported to be a terrific way to stay fit and I am now a believer. Despite this crazy, embarrassing setback, I've been able to get the scale to inch in the right direction. Winning!
So I say: "Walk on, sista, walk on!"
For those of you who don't know, I managed to roll both of my ankles (at the same time) early this spring while headed out to work. It wasn't icy. It wasn't all that cold. I wasn't wearing towering heels or in a terrible hurry. I simply stepped off of my back porch and my left ankle gave out. When I tried to catch myself with my right ankle, I rolled that one too. I found myself laying flat on my back in a puddle of my spilled coffee staring up at the sky thinking "Who in the world am I going to get to come scrape me off of my patio?"
It couldn't be the hubs, as he hadn't gotten home from work until after 3:30am and he was upstairs completely konked out... A neighbor? Nah, I don't really want them to see me like this: ripped knee in my brand new pants, drenched in coffee, and whimpering like a 6 week old puppy. So I tried to stand... NOT my smartest decision of the day and let's be honest- it wasn't even 7 a.m. and I wasn't off to a great start.
I proceeded to crawl up the two steps and into my kitchen where as I tried to tenderly peel my boots off while my dogs assisted in the cleaning off of the coffee now dripping down my face. Again, not my proudest moment. It took me several minutes to roll myself onto my feet but then I did manage to hobble my way into my laundry room and change into a different outfit, slip on some flats and make my way to work, mewling all the way. By mid-afternoon, both of my ankles were so swollen, my boss sent me home. Oh yeah, they were that bad.
I have spent the last few months babying my ankles and still trying to find a way to exercise. NOT an easy task when most of the activities I was involved in, Focus T25, Zumba, volleyball all involve jumping and having good balance. No dice. So now I walk. I try to walk every single day and my FitBit helps to keep me accountable. Walking may not make you sweat buckets, but it is purported to be a terrific way to stay fit and I am now a believer. Despite this crazy, embarrassing setback, I've been able to get the scale to inch in the right direction. Winning!
So I say: "Walk on, sista, walk on!"
Monday, July 20, 2015
New Adventures Start With a Look Back
As I embark on this new adventure, I believe it should begin with a look back at where it began. Don't worry, this won't be about the day I was born or to the beginning of time, but it will be more serious than I usually post. Just to where my adventure, my life began with my dear husband. I find that new, great love can often inspire us to be better. To be more. I am truly blessed that he makes me want to be the best person, the best partner that I can be. He inspires me most every day. He is supportive and has even told me that he loves my 'tummy.' If that isn't love, I don't know what is. He stands by me and allows me to be myself- thick or thin (me, that is).
When we first started dating, we had been friends for over a year and I had been in love with him for most of that time. Sad, but true. His charm and charisma still sometimes stop me in my tracks. His bravery in the face of all that we have been through is staggering. He is brilliant, beautiful, bold and maddening at the same time.
Once upon a time, I used to write poetry. I rarely share it because it is often too personal, too raw. But today, inexplicably, I find myself yet again inspired. I want you to know what I saw in him, in myself more than 10 years ago. Things I still see today and that's how I know that my adventure is still in its infancy. There is so much more to come.
Those who know me, know I have a favorite phrase. It is only 2 words, but they sum up life without fuss. "Love is..." And then you get to fill in the blank. It is a reminder to me that love is in the little, every day minutia. And here I will share a bit about what I believe about love.
Without further ado:
When we first started dating, we had been friends for over a year and I had been in love with him for most of that time. Sad, but true. His charm and charisma still sometimes stop me in my tracks. His bravery in the face of all that we have been through is staggering. He is brilliant, beautiful, bold and maddening at the same time.
Once upon a time, I used to write poetry. I rarely share it because it is often too personal, too raw. But today, inexplicably, I find myself yet again inspired. I want you to know what I saw in him, in myself more than 10 years ago. Things I still see today and that's how I know that my adventure is still in its infancy. There is so much more to come.
Those who know me, know I have a favorite phrase. It is only 2 words, but they sum up life without fuss. "Love is..." And then you get to fill in the blank. It is a reminder to me that love is in the little, every day minutia. And here I will share a bit about what I believe about love.
Without further ado:
Love is Poetry.
Love is chaotic, yet
Uncomplicated.
Love is palpable, yet
Untouchable.
Love is pure, yet
Muddled.
Love is wholesome, yet
Wicked.
Love is gentle, yet
Unyielding.
Love is loneliness, yet
I am not alone.
Love is beyond my grasp, yet
I hold it in my heart.
Thursday, July 16, 2015
My New Plan. To WIN Every Day
Hello there! It has been a while. Ii didn't have much to say about the subject of weight loss since I have gained most of the weight back that I lost writing this blog. I think I am going to try again to inspire/disgust/entertain you with my goofy little antics.
To start with, I am going small... I plan to WIN every day. Allow me to explain what I mean:
Step 1) I will do something active every day. Even if that just entails walking on my lunch break for 10 minutes. I need to move more to burn calories, clear my mind and get myself back on a track where weight loss is possible. Not being able to take a full, deep breath in my favorite jeans is not good times. Oh, who am I kidding?!?! I cannot sit or stand in them at this point. Bend over and buckle/tie my shoes? It's all just a fantasy at this moment. Dream ON, sista!
Step 2) I will make at least one better food/beverage decision every day. Double butterburger with all the trimmings? YUM. If I choose the grilled chicken sandwich instead? I'm calling it a win. Cold cut sub instead of half of a large pizza? Win! If I drink one diet soda instead of my favorite, painfully caloric beers? Win. A glass of water instead of that bottle of wine? (And yes, I said bottle) Win.
This plan is about baby steps for me. I got discouraged last time having very little to celebrate. To make sure that doesn't happen to me again, in this plan, I win EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
Pretty sure that's a plan I can live with. And soon, I hope to build on it. Care to join me?
To start with, I am going small... I plan to WIN every day. Allow me to explain what I mean:
Step 1) I will do something active every day. Even if that just entails walking on my lunch break for 10 minutes. I need to move more to burn calories, clear my mind and get myself back on a track where weight loss is possible. Not being able to take a full, deep breath in my favorite jeans is not good times. Oh, who am I kidding?!?! I cannot sit or stand in them at this point. Bend over and buckle/tie my shoes? It's all just a fantasy at this moment. Dream ON, sista!
Step 2) I will make at least one better food/beverage decision every day. Double butterburger with all the trimmings? YUM. If I choose the grilled chicken sandwich instead? I'm calling it a win. Cold cut sub instead of half of a large pizza? Win! If I drink one diet soda instead of my favorite, painfully caloric beers? Win. A glass of water instead of that bottle of wine? (And yes, I said bottle) Win.
This plan is about baby steps for me. I got discouraged last time having very little to celebrate. To make sure that doesn't happen to me again, in this plan, I win EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
Pretty sure that's a plan I can live with. And soon, I hope to build on it. Care to join me?
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Bat Wings Be Damned!
I have to be honest, as that's what this site is really about. I haven't been good. I have been eating garbage and not working out as much as I should. Do I feel guilty? A little. Ah well. "To err is human; to forgive, divine." ~Alexander Pope In that spirit, I forgive me.
But herein lies the trouble with giving myself the summer 'off': November 3 marks the 6 month countdown to my wedding. Uh-oh. It's almost time for dress fittings!
So here starts my renewed effort to get with the program. Back to the gym 4-5 times a week. Back to watching what I eat. Back to all of the things that I know I should have been doing all along. I hope to drop 15 lbs. by the wedding. I don't want to lose so much that my dress needs extensive alterations!
Most of all, I have to tone up these arms! I don't need my 'bat wings' flappin' in the breeze while I try to dance the night away! And for this very reason, I am going to start doing more weight training. Mandatory. Previously, I have focused primarily on cardio and keeping my heart rate up. This time around, I'll pump more iron. Gotta do it. And they say that muscle burns fat anyway, so it should be a win-win! Unless I can't lift my arms to brush my teeth. Or my hair. Should all be worth it in the end!
I need a new mantra though. Something that captures my goals in a catchy little phrase. Hmmm... I think I've got it!
"Bat wings be damned!"
But herein lies the trouble with giving myself the summer 'off': November 3 marks the 6 month countdown to my wedding. Uh-oh. It's almost time for dress fittings!
So here starts my renewed effort to get with the program. Back to the gym 4-5 times a week. Back to watching what I eat. Back to all of the things that I know I should have been doing all along. I hope to drop 15 lbs. by the wedding. I don't want to lose so much that my dress needs extensive alterations!
Most of all, I have to tone up these arms! I don't need my 'bat wings' flappin' in the breeze while I try to dance the night away! And for this very reason, I am going to start doing more weight training. Mandatory. Previously, I have focused primarily on cardio and keeping my heart rate up. This time around, I'll pump more iron. Gotta do it. And they say that muscle burns fat anyway, so it should be a win-win! Unless I can't lift my arms to brush my teeth. Or my hair. Should all be worth it in the end!
I need a new mantra though. Something that captures my goals in a catchy little phrase. Hmmm... I think I've got it!
"Bat wings be damned!"
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Red-Faced
Working out hard leaves me red-faced, literally. And because of it, the people who approach me to ask if I'm going to be okay don't see how I blush in embarrassment and shame. Remember people, just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't happening.
Now, I acknowledge that after an hour of cardio, I do look a little frightening. My hair is all over and my face is beet red. I'm not exaggerating about the color of red. People constantly ask me if I'm okay, like I might stroke out any second. I wish I could stop it from happening, but I can't. If I'm too warm, I turn red. If I'm embarrassed, I turn red. If I have been exerting myself, I turn red. The moral of the story? More often than not- my face is day-glow red. What can I say? I like to stand out in a crowd.
In previous posts, I have told you that I don't dress up or put on make-up to go to the gym so you know I don't care much what I look like there. However, this one thing that I cannot control or cover-up constantly causes me grief. I know that my post-workout face could lead Santa through a whiteout blizzard on Christmas Eve; I just choose not to look at it.
Please don't misunderstand me; I appreciate the concern of these people who don't know me from the Tooth Fairy, but fielding these questions almost every single time I exercise has literally chased me out of the gym. I work out at home now because at least there no one asks me if I need to sit down for a minute. I like being anonymous at the gym. I like to go, get it done and get the hell out of there.
By all means, if someone looks like they need immediate medical attention- ask. Just don't be offended if it ends up being me and I clench my fists, stare you down and through gritted teeth mutter, "For the thousandth time, I'm fine. My face is just red."
Now, I acknowledge that after an hour of cardio, I do look a little frightening. My hair is all over and my face is beet red. I'm not exaggerating about the color of red. People constantly ask me if I'm okay, like I might stroke out any second. I wish I could stop it from happening, but I can't. If I'm too warm, I turn red. If I'm embarrassed, I turn red. If I have been exerting myself, I turn red. The moral of the story? More often than not- my face is day-glow red. What can I say? I like to stand out in a crowd.
In previous posts, I have told you that I don't dress up or put on make-up to go to the gym so you know I don't care much what I look like there. However, this one thing that I cannot control or cover-up constantly causes me grief. I know that my post-workout face could lead Santa through a whiteout blizzard on Christmas Eve; I just choose not to look at it.
Please don't misunderstand me; I appreciate the concern of these people who don't know me from the Tooth Fairy, but fielding these questions almost every single time I exercise has literally chased me out of the gym. I work out at home now because at least there no one asks me if I need to sit down for a minute. I like being anonymous at the gym. I like to go, get it done and get the hell out of there.
By all means, if someone looks like they need immediate medical attention- ask. Just don't be offended if it ends up being me and I clench my fists, stare you down and through gritted teeth mutter, "For the thousandth time, I'm fine. My face is just red."
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
Does Lean = Mean?
Tell me ladies, what's up with all of the mean muggin' at the gym!? We are all there for the same basic purpose, right? Personally, I treat it like if I were passing someone on a narrow sidewalk. I stay out of everyone else's way if possible. But if we happen to occupy the same space at the same time, I smile and make eye contact and say "Excuse me." Sounds simple enough, right? That's where you'd be wrong.
In most cases like this, I find the lady I am trying to move past glaring at me like I just stepped on her kitten. Why? I'm not racing them to their machine. I'm not showing off my muscular physique (HA!) in tiny clothes and chatting up their man. Mostly, I am trying to churn out my cardio and make a run for it. I like to get in, get it done, and get out. I wish like hell that I was an exercise lover, but alas, it isn't to be!
So, why do rules of engagement and politeness not apply at the gym? Like it or not, we all have to be there at some point. Why not make the best of it? Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to form lifelong bonds while I'm there. I'd just rather not have the other people staring daggers at me the whole time. Maybe I have broken some unspoken gym rule? If so, merely say so. Gym-savvy is definitely not how I'd describe myself!
As for me, I am choosing the higher path. Well, if by higher path you thought I meant chanting the "Golden Rule" repeatedly as if I were on a grade school playground, then you'd have hit the nail on the head... Look at me being a grown up!
In most cases like this, I find the lady I am trying to move past glaring at me like I just stepped on her kitten. Why? I'm not racing them to their machine. I'm not showing off my muscular physique (HA!) in tiny clothes and chatting up their man. Mostly, I am trying to churn out my cardio and make a run for it. I like to get in, get it done, and get out. I wish like hell that I was an exercise lover, but alas, it isn't to be!
So, why do rules of engagement and politeness not apply at the gym? Like it or not, we all have to be there at some point. Why not make the best of it? Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to form lifelong bonds while I'm there. I'd just rather not have the other people staring daggers at me the whole time. Maybe I have broken some unspoken gym rule? If so, merely say so. Gym-savvy is definitely not how I'd describe myself!
As for me, I am choosing the higher path. Well, if by higher path you thought I meant chanting the "Golden Rule" repeatedly as if I were on a grade school playground, then you'd have hit the nail on the head... Look at me being a grown up!
Monday, June 24, 2013
IBS: Icky Belly Syndrome
You always hear talk of people who exercise to 'get healthy,' not to lose weight. They make their weight loss take a backseat to the simple pleasure of feeling better every day. Truth be told, I used to roll my eyes at those people. Now I find that I might just be one of them.
**I warn you-- this post is chock full of TMI. Read at your own risk.**
I, just like millions of people, suffer from IBS. As I have gotten older, mine has flip-flopped on me. It's no longer the fear of not being able to get to the bathroom fast enough. It's now the wonder at why I never need one at all.
For some time, I seemed to have my symptoms under control. Now? Every day of my life, I feel like that poor deer that has been lying on the side of the road in mid-August heat for a week. Miserably bloated. Just poking my tummy makes me wince in pain. Trust me; this is no way to live. My jeans barely button and only my men's XL t-shirts cover the 6-month-pregnant belly I'm sporting. Not that there's anything wrong with that pregnant belly, IF in fact you are pregnant. I, however, am not.
To help find a solution to my daily agony, I have been doing tons of research on IBS and most every article reads the same way: keep a food journal (even though most doctors will tell you that food triggers are uncommon with IBS), hydrate, add fiber, and get in 20-30 minutes of moderate exercise 3-5 times a week. I do most of these things. I am getting in my 10,000 steps a day. I drink water. I take a fiber supplement. But I am not losing weight and I am not controlling my symptoms of IBS. Therefore, I am issuing myself the challenge of putting the exercise Rx to the test. I vow to hit the gym a few times a week again, solely with the plan to see if my IBS will improve.
Currently, I find myself miserable more often than not. I just want to feel normal. Thus, I am becoming one of those people I used to roll my eyes at. I am someone who is going to the gym to feel better- not look better. Don't get me wrong, if a few of these extra pounds fall off in the process, all the better.
**I warn you-- this post is chock full of TMI. Read at your own risk.**
I, just like millions of people, suffer from IBS. As I have gotten older, mine has flip-flopped on me. It's no longer the fear of not being able to get to the bathroom fast enough. It's now the wonder at why I never need one at all.
For some time, I seemed to have my symptoms under control. Now? Every day of my life, I feel like that poor deer that has been lying on the side of the road in mid-August heat for a week. Miserably bloated. Just poking my tummy makes me wince in pain. Trust me; this is no way to live. My jeans barely button and only my men's XL t-shirts cover the 6-month-pregnant belly I'm sporting. Not that there's anything wrong with that pregnant belly, IF in fact you are pregnant. I, however, am not.
To help find a solution to my daily agony, I have been doing tons of research on IBS and most every article reads the same way: keep a food journal (even though most doctors will tell you that food triggers are uncommon with IBS), hydrate, add fiber, and get in 20-30 minutes of moderate exercise 3-5 times a week. I do most of these things. I am getting in my 10,000 steps a day. I drink water. I take a fiber supplement. But I am not losing weight and I am not controlling my symptoms of IBS. Therefore, I am issuing myself the challenge of putting the exercise Rx to the test. I vow to hit the gym a few times a week again, solely with the plan to see if my IBS will improve.
Currently, I find myself miserable more often than not. I just want to feel normal. Thus, I am becoming one of those people I used to roll my eyes at. I am someone who is going to the gym to feel better- not look better. Don't get me wrong, if a few of these extra pounds fall off in the process, all the better.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Wedding as a Motivation?
I have been trying to motivate myself more lately. In short, it's not working.
I have a wedding coming up... MINE! But still I am finding myself lacking in the motivation department. I refrained from buying my dress too small to get my butt in gear. (Not that I had a choice... the floor model IS my dress. Last of it's kind.) In fact, my dress fits perfectly as is.
Truly what I want to look better in my dress is not only shrinking my waistline (certainly couldn't hurt!) but having my arms and back look better in it. After all, that's mostly what people see. And I am dreading the possibility of back-fat dripping over the top of my dress. And the armpit fat. What the hell is that anyway!?
Here lies my predicament: I despise weight training. And the machines at the gym might as well have come from Mars along with men. They should be easy with the diagrams, but having all of those buff people wandering around snickering when I am using a leg machine for my arms doesn't help my confidence level. I know there are people to ask during the day, but I often go to the gym after-hours and don't know that I'd have the nerve to ask. I know, I am a gutless wonder.
So, I am going to challenge myself to learn at least one new machine every month between now and the wedding. I have some time, but that runs out faster than I anticipate, so I might as well get started. No time better than the present as they say! Or was it 'no present better than time?'
Either way, the best present I will give myself is a better wedding photo (other than a handsome-as-hell hubby). Then maybe I'll be able to hang one on my wall. Maybe.
I have a wedding coming up... MINE! But still I am finding myself lacking in the motivation department. I refrained from buying my dress too small to get my butt in gear. (Not that I had a choice... the floor model IS my dress. Last of it's kind.) In fact, my dress fits perfectly as is.
Truly what I want to look better in my dress is not only shrinking my waistline (certainly couldn't hurt!) but having my arms and back look better in it. After all, that's mostly what people see. And I am dreading the possibility of back-fat dripping over the top of my dress. And the armpit fat. What the hell is that anyway!?
Here lies my predicament: I despise weight training. And the machines at the gym might as well have come from Mars along with men. They should be easy with the diagrams, but having all of those buff people wandering around snickering when I am using a leg machine for my arms doesn't help my confidence level. I know there are people to ask during the day, but I often go to the gym after-hours and don't know that I'd have the nerve to ask. I know, I am a gutless wonder.
So, I am going to challenge myself to learn at least one new machine every month between now and the wedding. I have some time, but that runs out faster than I anticipate, so I might as well get started. No time better than the present as they say! Or was it 'no present better than time?'
Either way, the best present I will give myself is a better wedding photo (other than a handsome-as-hell hubby). Then maybe I'll be able to hang one on my wall. Maybe.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
40 Days & Nights Without? Not This Time!
Last year, when I gave up soda for Lent, my weight didn't budge. My mom thinks I am crazy for giving anything up at all. So this year, I am going to try something a little different. THIS year, I am going to add something every day for 40 days and 40 nights.
Is your curiosity peaked? Here goes: I am going to add exercises to my every day. They are as follows:
50 Crunches
25 Push Ups
50 Squats
25 Chair Dips
Doesn't sound like a lot, does it? But I have a feeling by Day 40, I will be cursing myself for taking on this endeavor. Fatigue and my crazy schedule means making time for anything extra is never as easy as it first appears.
Keep in mind that I am also headed to Mexico for a week. It will no doubt be a real treat, but exercising on vacation? Yuck. And when you factor in that I am terrified for my fiance to see me exercise, this could be harder than it sounds. But isn't that the point? To challenge yourself? To give something up is one thing; a very deprived feeling often follows. To challenge yourself to add a little exercise into your every day routine is another, hopefully more positive thing. I think it will pay off in confidence and for that reason, I am reluctant to measure my biceps and such beforehand. I'd much rather judge it by how I look in a tank top or how my jeans fit.
So here goes nothing! Care to join me?
Is your curiosity peaked? Here goes: I am going to add exercises to my every day. They are as follows:
50 Crunches
25 Push Ups
50 Squats
25 Chair Dips
Doesn't sound like a lot, does it? But I have a feeling by Day 40, I will be cursing myself for taking on this endeavor. Fatigue and my crazy schedule means making time for anything extra is never as easy as it first appears.
So here goes nothing! Care to join me?
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Getting Creative
Due to recent developments in my family and household, someone is required to be at home 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Obviously, this makes getting to the gym almost impossible. So I says to myself, "Self? We have a vacation coming up-- how in the world will we get into any kind of shape to cram ourselves into a bikini?"
Thus, I dance at my desk. I kid you not.
Let me begin by saying that I work alone. In an entire office by myself. My office is very large (and cold- the dancing warms me up), and I got this crazy idea from a couple of places.
Thus, I dance at my desk. I kid you not.
Let me begin by saying that I work alone. In an entire office by myself. My office is very large (and cold- the dancing warms me up), and I got this crazy idea from a couple of places.
- Everywhere on the internet I see videos and articles talking about exercising at your desk.
- I wear a Fitbit every day. For those of you who don't know, a Fitbit is a pedometer that talks to your computer via Bluetooth and a nifty little USB 'dongle.'
- I was taking a Zumba class every Monday that had my step-count soaring!
I know it sounds loony, and I think if anyone caught me, they'd stand and stare until they gathered their wits enough to point and laugh. I don't dance here constantly, but I try to get up once an hour and shake my groove thing for at least half a song. Picture this: Me, by myself, hopping and jiving around my office to either Pink, Michael Jackson, the Bee Gees. Oh yeah. Look at me go. The nice thing about dancing alone is when you almost trip over your own feet and face-plant on the corner of a table-- there is no one to laugh at you but yourself.
Not only has this helped me get in my steps and a little calorie burn, but I am genuinely happier throughout the day with more energy. Sounds corny, right? But when you are as enthusiastic and clumsy as I am, there are plenty of reasons to laugh.
So, I say: Try it. Why not? Busy office? Close the door and pull the shades. Shimmy while you are on hold with a customer. Dance when the elevator doors close. Boogie down when you have the bathroom to yourself.
Then let your coworkers wonder why you have this goofy grin on your face more often than not. It'll be our little secret!
Friday, January 4, 2013
Resolute
This year, I have resolved not to make any resolutions. Not only did the New Year pass without me even noticing between family events and my engagement!! But I think not setting myself up for disappointment this year is the way to go.
I now have a wedding to plan and save for. That alone is a daunting task. Feeling guilty a few months from now when I miss a day at the gym or eat something fried and smothered in butter is not something I am going to have time for this year.
Of course I want to slim down for my wedding, but the last few days of being sick and waking up late have even had me forgetting my beloved FitBit at home. Clipping it on my jeans had become second nature, but even that has gone by the wayside. Feeling bad about it? Yes I am. For now. But I am choosing to let it go.
I guess I have made a resolution after all. I resolve to be human. I resolve to make mistakes. I resolve to make a note of those mistakes, and then let them go.
A very wise, beautiful, amazing woman (Thank you, Grams!) once told me that by your 35th birthday, you are too old for guilt trips. I guess I am a little ahead of my time.
If you have made resolutions, good for you! Do your best. If sometimes you fall short, so be it. You deserve to live a guilt-free life. We all do. We cut our friends, families, coworkers, bosses and countless others some slack. Now it's time we do that same favor for ourselves.
Guilt trips be gone!
I now have a wedding to plan and save for. That alone is a daunting task. Feeling guilty a few months from now when I miss a day at the gym or eat something fried and smothered in butter is not something I am going to have time for this year.
Of course I want to slim down for my wedding, but the last few days of being sick and waking up late have even had me forgetting my beloved FitBit at home. Clipping it on my jeans had become second nature, but even that has gone by the wayside. Feeling bad about it? Yes I am. For now. But I am choosing to let it go.
I guess I have made a resolution after all. I resolve to be human. I resolve to make mistakes. I resolve to make a note of those mistakes, and then let them go.
A very wise, beautiful, amazing woman (Thank you, Grams!) once told me that by your 35th birthday, you are too old for guilt trips. I guess I am a little ahead of my time.
If you have made resolutions, good for you! Do your best. If sometimes you fall short, so be it. You deserve to live a guilt-free life. We all do. We cut our friends, families, coworkers, bosses and countless others some slack. Now it's time we do that same favor for ourselves.
Guilt trips be gone!
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Clash of the Thigh-tans
Thighs. A gift or a curse? I'll lean towards curse.
How do some women have that neat little space between their thighs when standing with their feet together? No damn fair. Even when I played sports 5-6 days a week year-round, I never had that. Nope, instead I get to wear through pants in the thigh area. What can I say, I am a lucky girl!
I go to the gym and do mostly cardio, but I have been slowly incorporating more and more strength training. I know cardio is to eliminate fat all over and strength training is to build muscle that tones and ultimately that burns more fat. I understand the equation. So why does the equation seem to come out with a different answer for each person? Damn genetics.
I cannot tell you how many times I have been on the elliptical and worried that my pace was too fast. How so, you ask? Because I was worried the friction of my thighs rubbing together was going to start a fire. I guess that's one way to "feel the burn."
And how about those cute little shorts some girls wear? HA. My thighs are hungry people. They literally eat my shorts. (Thank you Bart Simpson) I'm talking about that annoying, embarrassing creeping up that the shorts do in the crotch region. As if people can't see that my legs are curvy, my shorts manage to add an exclamation point. The alternative is board shorts or walking shorts. Not a good look on a woman with what I have been repeatedly told are 'child-bearing hips.' Oh yeah. Men say that.
No matter the size and shape, the jiggle and wiggle, or the fact that I fondly refer to them as my "wobbly bits," my thighs are mine. Forever. And they're taking me places.
How do some women have that neat little space between their thighs when standing with their feet together? No damn fair. Even when I played sports 5-6 days a week year-round, I never had that. Nope, instead I get to wear through pants in the thigh area. What can I say, I am a lucky girl!
I go to the gym and do mostly cardio, but I have been slowly incorporating more and more strength training. I know cardio is to eliminate fat all over and strength training is to build muscle that tones and ultimately that burns more fat. I understand the equation. So why does the equation seem to come out with a different answer for each person? Damn genetics.
I cannot tell you how many times I have been on the elliptical and worried that my pace was too fast. How so, you ask? Because I was worried the friction of my thighs rubbing together was going to start a fire. I guess that's one way to "feel the burn."
And how about those cute little shorts some girls wear? HA. My thighs are hungry people. They literally eat my shorts. (Thank you Bart Simpson) I'm talking about that annoying, embarrassing creeping up that the shorts do in the crotch region. As if people can't see that my legs are curvy, my shorts manage to add an exclamation point. The alternative is board shorts or walking shorts. Not a good look on a woman with what I have been repeatedly told are 'child-bearing hips.' Oh yeah. Men say that.
No matter the size and shape, the jiggle and wiggle, or the fact that I fondly refer to them as my "wobbly bits," my thighs are mine. Forever. And they're taking me places.
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Life gets in the way...
Working two jobs, going to school, maintaining and fixing a 102 year old house, writing a blog, spending time with family, cuddling my two dogs and boyfriend, trying to muster up the energy to have a social life... that's my crazy life in a nutshell.
All of these things are seriously getting in the way of me trying to lose weight. Fitting in exercise is not as easy as it sounds for most of us. I am really trying to get to the gym three or four times a week, but right now it just isn't happening. I have even started doing my readings and highlighting them while on the elliptical. For those of you who haven't tried it- it ain't easy. My fellow gym rats chuckle at me on a regular basis.
Take for instance THIS week. It is midterm week. On top of the short answer/essay exam, I also have to study for a quiz. For the same class. Who has a professor who schedules two tests in one week?? This girl. I have figured out that I have spent almost 18 hours studying this last week and I haven't even taken the damn exam yet.
The stress from all of this is also causing me to stress-eat and I am doing a mighty fine job of justifying it to myself. Yes, I splurged on chicken nuggets from McDonald's. They take me back to the good ol' days before the responsibilities of real grown-up life kicked in.
My solution to the time-crunch dilemma? Suck it up. Keep trying. Things could be worse. So off I go... to finish working my 18-hour day. To try and sneak in some sleep. To drag my butt to the gym two more times this week. I may not be losing tons of weight, but I'm keeping my head above water. And right now, that's something to celebrate!
All of these things are seriously getting in the way of me trying to lose weight. Fitting in exercise is not as easy as it sounds for most of us. I am really trying to get to the gym three or four times a week, but right now it just isn't happening. I have even started doing my readings and highlighting them while on the elliptical. For those of you who haven't tried it- it ain't easy. My fellow gym rats chuckle at me on a regular basis.
Take for instance THIS week. It is midterm week. On top of the short answer/essay exam, I also have to study for a quiz. For the same class. Who has a professor who schedules two tests in one week?? This girl. I have figured out that I have spent almost 18 hours studying this last week and I haven't even taken the damn exam yet.
The stress from all of this is also causing me to stress-eat and I am doing a mighty fine job of justifying it to myself. Yes, I splurged on chicken nuggets from McDonald's. They take me back to the good ol' days before the responsibilities of real grown-up life kicked in.
My solution to the time-crunch dilemma? Suck it up. Keep trying. Things could be worse. So off I go... to finish working my 18-hour day. To try and sneak in some sleep. To drag my butt to the gym two more times this week. I may not be losing tons of weight, but I'm keeping my head above water. And right now, that's something to celebrate!
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Christina Aguilera is FAT!?!?
In what world is Christina Aguilera fat!?!? True, she is a curvy woman now and not stick thin. What of it? She is a beautiful and talented woman on a major TV show. Yet that isn't enough?
Why is it that society is so concerned with weight? I know I think about it every minute of every day. Sad, but true. I try my best not to focus on it, but let's be honest- it's a major part of our culture and that's why weight is what this blog focuses on. I chose this topic because it seems to affect my friends and family constantly. Usually in a negative way. I wanted this blog to be a positive thing for people to read, and laugh about, and have a place to say what we are really thinking.
I have rolls. Ugh. I still can't believe I typed that. In the vein of being honest, there is the unvarnished truth. Now, I don't see any rolls on Christina. She has been quoted as saying, "I told them during this Lotus recording, 'You are working with a fat girl. Know it now and get over it,'" she said. "My body can't put anyone in jeopardy of not making money anymore -- my body is just not on the table that way anymore."
How sad that it ever WAS on the table like that. Everywhere we see people saying 'Embrace your originality and your body type' in one breath and 'Woah there, fatty. That outfit was not meant for you' in the next.
Here's what it boils down to for me. Be yourself. Go ahead and strive to be a better version of yourself, but don't hold yourself to Hollywood's standards, even Christina Aguilera isn't doing that anymore. You will just be setting yourself up for disappointment.
And try to keep in mind, these 'stars' have the luxury of personal trainers, nutritionists, personal chefs and cosmetic surgery. And that lusted-after advantage of air-brushing. Chin up. You rock just the way you are. Rolls and all.
Why is it that society is so concerned with weight? I know I think about it every minute of every day. Sad, but true. I try my best not to focus on it, but let's be honest- it's a major part of our culture and that's why weight is what this blog focuses on. I chose this topic because it seems to affect my friends and family constantly. Usually in a negative way. I wanted this blog to be a positive thing for people to read, and laugh about, and have a place to say what we are really thinking.
I have rolls. Ugh. I still can't believe I typed that. In the vein of being honest, there is the unvarnished truth. Now, I don't see any rolls on Christina. She has been quoted as saying, "I told them during this Lotus recording, 'You are working with a fat girl. Know it now and get over it,'" she said. "My body can't put anyone in jeopardy of not making money anymore -- my body is just not on the table that way anymore."
How sad that it ever WAS on the table like that. Everywhere we see people saying 'Embrace your originality and your body type' in one breath and 'Woah there, fatty. That outfit was not meant for you' in the next.
Here's what it boils down to for me. Be yourself. Go ahead and strive to be a better version of yourself, but don't hold yourself to Hollywood's standards, even Christina Aguilera isn't doing that anymore. You will just be setting yourself up for disappointment.
Friday, September 28, 2012
New Shoes!
What is it about a new pair of shoes that gets a girl's heart racing? Truthfully, I have no idea what the science is behind it. True, obsessive shoe buying is a stereotype, but that doesn't make it any less true. That's the thing about stereotypes ... at some point before all of the exaggerations and jokes it was based on someone's version of the truth.
As a treat to myself and to replace my beloved pair of tennies that I wore through TWO Dirty Girl Mud Runs and then donated, today I bought a new pair.
I have joked a time or two in this blog about trying to look your best at the gym when after a good sweat session people often look like they ran through a sprinkler. As it should be! However, there is something to wanting a new, fancy pair of kicks.
I hope my slick new tennies will also serve as motivation to get back to the gym more often. Here's hoping!
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
School Lunch Commotion
Have you all read the article at www.jsonline.com about the students who are boycotting school lunches?
http://www.jsonline.com/news/education/students-strike-against-new-federal-school-lunch-rules-t96t7sp-170124676.html
I tend to agree with some of the regulations on school lunches and making them healthier. HOWEVER-- telling a student how many calories they can take in at one meal seems extreme. No doubt, childhood obesity is a problem in our country. BUT, I think the solution lies at home and in programs like Play60 where parents should make sure that their kids get in at least 60 minutes of active play a day. Now that seems like an idea.
Granted, no cookie-cutter solution works for everyone. If it did, we would have no need for personal trainers and nutritionists to make "get healthy" plans customized for each of their clients. I'd be willing to bet those professions are still booming even in these tough economic times because people are always striving to be skinnier, healthier, more... something.
Please keep in mind that I am not yet a parent although I hope to be one someday. When the time comes, I think that it should be my choice as to how many calories my kids can have. Absolutely, there should be more healthy options available. Certainly, there should be a limit to the amount of junk food offered to school children in a school cafeteria. At some point, don't we have to trust our kids to start making healthier choices on their own?
By the way, no one is forcing these kids to eat school lunches. They are merely an OPTION. These kids can bring lunch from home every day. And that is exactly what they are doing in this boycott. I think that this is actually the best outcome we could have hoped for. Now their parents can see and help choose what they get to eat for lunch.
My suggestion to fix all of this conflict surrounding a school lunch is this: do what they did when I went to school. Each student gets a calendar showing the "Hot School Lunch" option for each day. If they don't like it- they have to take a lunch. Period. That may mean some kids with food allergies have to take their lunch to school every day- but wouldn't that be safer anyway?
Kids are spoiled. I miss the days of "eat what's on your plate, or go hungry." Don't you?
http://www.jsonline.com/news/education/students-strike-against-new-federal-school-lunch-rules-t96t7sp-170124676.html
I tend to agree with some of the regulations on school lunches and making them healthier. HOWEVER-- telling a student how many calories they can take in at one meal seems extreme. No doubt, childhood obesity is a problem in our country. BUT, I think the solution lies at home and in programs like Play60 where parents should make sure that their kids get in at least 60 minutes of active play a day. Now that seems like an idea.
Granted, no cookie-cutter solution works for everyone. If it did, we would have no need for personal trainers and nutritionists to make "get healthy" plans customized for each of their clients. I'd be willing to bet those professions are still booming even in these tough economic times because people are always striving to be skinnier, healthier, more... something.
Please keep in mind that I am not yet a parent although I hope to be one someday. When the time comes, I think that it should be my choice as to how many calories my kids can have. Absolutely, there should be more healthy options available. Certainly, there should be a limit to the amount of junk food offered to school children in a school cafeteria. At some point, don't we have to trust our kids to start making healthier choices on their own?
By the way, no one is forcing these kids to eat school lunches. They are merely an OPTION. These kids can bring lunch from home every day. And that is exactly what they are doing in this boycott. I think that this is actually the best outcome we could have hoped for. Now their parents can see and help choose what they get to eat for lunch.
My suggestion to fix all of this conflict surrounding a school lunch is this: do what they did when I went to school. Each student gets a calendar showing the "Hot School Lunch" option for each day. If they don't like it- they have to take a lunch. Period. That may mean some kids with food allergies have to take their lunch to school every day- but wouldn't that be safer anyway?
Kids are spoiled. I miss the days of "eat what's on your plate, or go hungry." Don't you?
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